Weekly Rundown: 23rd - 27th March 2009
Raw 23/03/2009
ECW 24/03/2009
Smackdown 27/03/2009
The Raw Review - 23/03/2009
Opening Segment
Wooo!
Raw tonight kicks off with a promo from the legendary Ric Flair. Cutting to the chase early on Naich accepts the challenge laid down by Jericho last week, on behalf of Piper, Snuka and Steamboat.
He says he will be honoured to stand in the ‘legends’ corner and to hold their hands high in celebration when they win. Jericho interrupts him from the tv truck and says that he remembers watching those legends at WrestleMania I, but that was 25 years ago and although he never dreamt it would happen then, he has become better than all of them.
Jericho asked if the legends thought that this was a movie like Micky Rourke’s ‘The Wrestler’. He then explained that while Rourke could shout ‘cut’ and have a break, at WM they wouldn’t have this option.
By this time he had made his way to the ring and went into his usual shpiel about the legends not being able to stay out of the limelight. Nothing we haven’t really heard before, other than Jericho claiming he planned on embarrassing the team of legends in front of Rourke who will be sat at ringside.
Flair hit back at Jericho, claiming he was never going to be Hall of Fame material and that the legends deserved to be respected, then went into classic Nature Boy mode saying he will invite Rourke into the ring after Jericho has been defeated and let him join in with the ‘Woooo’s.
Jericho lashed out at Flair busting him open, then continued to attack The Nature Boy on the outside, even beating him with his own shoes before tossing them into the crowd.
In a sick finale Jericho grabbed a camera and drilled Flair in the head, leaving him beaten and bloodied, before removing his watch (which I believe he received at the Hall of Fame ceremony) and stamping on it atop the steel steps.
Looking on the bright side of things; Flair might have been battered to a pulp, but 2 lucky fans are going home with half a pair of very expensive shoes.
Match 1
Jeff Hardy Vs. Dolph Ziggler in an Extreme Rules Match
Ziggler started strongly, beating down Jeff and grabbing a chair, before avoiding Jeff’s springboard heel kick from the chair and hitting him with a trash can. As well as Ziggler has started, I think we all know there’s only one possible winner of this one.
Ziggler attempted a superplex onto the trash can, but Jeff reversed it and dropped his opponent onto it face first before delivering Twists of Fate onto the same can and a steel chair. A Swanton Bomb wrapped up the match and kept Jeff rolling towards WrestleMania.
After the match Jeff said he knew Matt was watching, then in his typically awful promo style (half growled/half shouted) that this wasn’t extreme but at WrestleMania it will be.
Jeff Hardy wins by Pinfall.
Segment 2
An Ode to Vikki
After clips the finale of last week’s Smackdown John Cena read out a ‘get well soon’ card to Vikki Guererro, in which he showed photoshopped pictures of potential Edge/Vikki and Big Show/Vikki love-children, questioned whether they were both with her for love or for her managerial power and assured her that he would win the title at WrestleMania.
Match 2
Kofi Kingston, M.V.P, Christian & C.M Punk Vs. Shelton Benjamin, Mark Henry, Kane & Finlay (w/Tony Atlas)
As good as this match was, it wasn’t much different to the 6 man match last week. If anything it lost a little of its edge with the lack of Superstar commentary and opinion, although personally I didn’t miss Hornswaggle grunting away.
Some sort of technical difficulty struck early on in this match, when Ric Flair’s voice boomed around the arena as Finlay and M.V.P grappled. Shortly after the action returned from a commercial break the action completely broke down, resulting in Christian hitting Shelton Benjamin with the KillSwitch (Unprettier is a better name) to win the match for his team.
After the bell Finlay grabbed a ladder and took out everyone, re-ascerting his ‘face’ character despite being on the ‘heel’ team tonight.
Kofi Kingston, M.V.P, Christian & C.M Punk win by Pinfall.
Segment 3
Orton Interview
After showing footage of the impromptu Cage Match last week on Raw, Todd Grisham asked Orton if Triple H now has the psychological edge over him going into WrestleMania. Orton said that what the clip hadn’t shown was that on Smackdown Triple H had called him a coward, but so far all of his actions have been quite the opposite while breaking into Orton’s house and threatening his wife fitted that description much more accurately.
He then went on to say that what he has done to the McMahons will pale in comparison to what he plans on doing to Triple H at WrestleMania, and that he and his family brought it upon themselves.
Match 3
Edge Vs. The Big Show
After Edge had made his way to the ring, Jillian Garcia introduced the interim General Manager of Raw; Vikki Guererro. As she is back in her wheelchair following the knocks she took last week on Smackdown, Chavo rolled her to ringside.
After the commercials and Big Show’s entrance Cena appeared on the Titan-Tron and said he’d love to be there but he’s busy preparing for his appearance on ‘The Tonight Show’. He said the situation between the two is pathetic and that everyone is laughing at them, so for one night they should do themselves a favour and wrestle like two of the top superstars in the company.
He then wrapped up by saying he would win at WrestleMania, and then both men in the ring will have slept with Vikki Guererro for absolutely nothing.
Big Show bossed the early going, repeatedly shouting ‘He doesn’t deserve you’ whenever he had a free minute from beating on Edge. Just as it looked like Edge might be getting back into this one Show managed to tangle him up in the ropes and looked like he might be going for a Knock-Out Punch. Vikki pleaded for him not to do it and when he wouldn’t listen sent Chavo into the ring, ending the match as a no-contest.
Chavo attacked Show long enough for Edge to free himself, and then received a Spear for his troubles as Show moved out of the way. Show then finally delivered the big right hand to Edge, leaving him laying in the ring.
Match ended in a No-Contest.
Match 4
Rey Mysterio Vs. William Regal (w/Layla)
JBL finally returned to the commentary booth for this one, as it seems he and Rey will meet at Mania for the Intercontinental Championship. Talk about a rushed match lacking in hype, and aside from that we’ve seen Rey Vs. JBL numerous times including for the World Heavyweight Championship, and it wasn’t very enjoyable then either.
Regal wrestled in his usual stiff style and at one point looked like he might have broken Rey’s nose, however it later transpired that he was in fact playing possum and moments later he won the match with a 619.
Following the bell JBL stood up to offer mock applause and Rey took offense, hitting him with a dropkick to the face through the ropes.
Rey Mysterio wins by Pinfall.
Segment 4
Undertaker and HBK
After last week’s ambush attack from HBK, The Undertaker once again appeared on Raw to address his opponent’s actions and comments. Taker said he had taken on board Michaels comments, and it was true that he has never beaten him in competition, but he reminded The Showstopper that the last time they met HBK spent almost 5 years at home in utter agony. He then told him to remember that he had brought this whole thing on himself.
HBK interrupted with a video segment, in which he stalked around ‘Takers Graveyard’, re-living his opponents 16-0 streak. Shawn then showed a freshly dug grave and explained that it wasn’t for him, but for The Undertaker, a place for his streak to rot and decay. He finished the segment with a cringe worthy impression of Taker, saying ‘Undefeated streak. Rest. In. Peace.’
Taker looked disturbed and angered by what he had seen, and The King speculated whether Shawn had gotten inside his head, and whether we will see the same Undertaker at this year’s WrestleMania.
Match 5
Santino Marella Vs. Mickey James
Before this match Santino said he was sure he knew who was going to win the 25 Diva Battle Royal, then stunned the crowd by announcing it would he him. He then explained that last week after being attacked by Mickey James, he spoke to the G.M and asked to be included in the match. Vikki said he could be a participant if he beat Mickey tonight with one hand tied behind his back.
Santino once again made himself look like an idiot. After missing a splash in the corner, Mickey tied both of his hands behind his back. He then said he didn’t need any hands to beat her and proceeded to execute some of the most bizarre offence I’ve ever seen, culminating in a failed attempt at climbing to the top rope.
Mickey won the match with a Chick Kick and made sure the Miss WrestleMania match would stay Diva-exclusive.
Mickey James wins by Pinfall.
Main Event Match
Triple H Vs. Randy Orton & Ted DiBiase
I stand corrected regarding Ric Flair’s watch; apparently it was the watch Shawn Michaels gave him after their match at last year’s WrestleMania. Another interesting development before this match; The King has called Jericho out for next week. It begs the question why didn’t he attempt to help Flair tonight, but still should make for entertaining viewing next week.
The main event begins and Triple H looked strong. However as The Game went under the ring for his Sledgehammer, he found Cody Rhodes instead, who emerged instead with a pair of handcuffs. After a 3 on 1 beating Legacy handcuffed him to the top rope and stalked him like a pack of dogs, eventually striking and beating him down.
Orton grabbed a microphone and told Triple H that there was only one person who could save him now, and SHE had better hurry. He then retrieved the sledgehammer from under the ring and seemed to be planning on swinging it into The Game’s head, before Stephanie ran down the ramp.
Despite pleas from Triple H telling her to get back she jumped up on the apron and was surrounded by Legacy. Orton then delivered what has come to be his trademark DDT from the ropes, right in front of The Game but just far enough to be out of reach.
He then looked to be planning on hitting Triple H with the sledgehammer, only to change his focus to Stephanie. After dropping the weapon he instead layed over her and kissed her unconscious body.
Finally he drilled Triple H in the head with the sledgehammer before leaving the ring to a chorus of boo’s from the crowd as the show ended.
Match ended in a No-Contest.
The ECW Digest - 24/03/2009
Opening Match
John Morrison (w/The Miz & Nikki) Vs. Carlito (w/Primo & Brie)
As I predicted the Bella twins are now divided; Nikki siding with The Miz and John Morrison and Brie siding with Carlito and Primo.
It’ll be interesting to see if this division lasts. I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them turned on their respective team at WrestleMania. Disappointed that the ‘big WrestleMania turn’ that usually happens is one of them; Yes. Surprised? No.
As for the match, it wasn’t really anything we hadn’t seen in their numerous tag matches of late. After receiving a beating from Carlito, John Morrison decided to walk out on the match only to have his exit blocked by ECW General Manager Teddy Long.
In what is blatantly an attempt to get everyone involved in WrestleMania, Long announced that the Tag Titles would be unified in a Lumberjack Match. The following Superstars then emerged from the back and drove John Morrison and his cohorts back to the ring:
The Great Khali
R-Truth
Jamie Noble
Goldust
Mike Knox
Vladimir Kozlov
Cryme Tyme
Rider & Hawkins
Chavo Guererro
Gregory Helms
William Regal
Jimmy Wang Yang
Paul Birchill
(there was one other guy at the front who I couldn’t make out, if you know who it is let me know via the contact us page)
The match continued for a few minutes with the lumberjacks surrounding the ring, giving us a taste of what to expect at WrestleMania. It came to a conclusion when Morrison was thrown to the outside, then thrown back inside by the lumberjacks and finally hit with a Back Stabber by Carlito.
Carlito wins by pinfall.
Segment 1
Hall of Fink and Raw Re-Run
After the previous match Howard Finkel was announced as the final member of the 2009 class of Hall of Fame Inductees. Much respect to Finkel, he’s taken a lot of crap over the years and even in his Hall of Fame inductee video they basically made him look like a complete fool. That being said, I suggest if you have the time, head over to WWE.com and watch it, because it really does encapsulate some of the kind of moments that made the Attitude era fantastic.
Following this we were treated to around 10 minutes of clips and hype. Firstly we were shown highlights of Orton’s horrific attack on Triple H and Stephanie from Raw the previous night, then after some WrestleMania hype we were shown the footage of John Cena pushing his new (and most probably awful, although I’ll refrain from judging properly until I’ve seen it) movie on The Tonight Show.
Match 2
Jack Swagger & Tyson Kidd (w/Natalya) Vs. Tommy Dreamer & Evan Bourne
Two very interesting combinations here, and it’s also interesting to see that the ECW Champion doesn’t actually have any sort of feud leading up to Mania, with both of his potential rivals from recent weeks being sidetracked by the Money inthe Bank match.
Bourne and Kidd look destined to battle each other in the future, which would lead me to believe that IF anyone is going to face Swagger for his title at Mania it’s going to be Dreamer. Considering he has just been part of a losing streak/retirement angle it could be that Dreamer is set to have one last shot at the title before calling it a day, which would be a very easy way to build a lot of hype in a short space of time.
This match was great; Kidd once again looked like a future champion, Swagger and Dreamer both put in solid performances and Bourne showed everyone why they should be excited about his return.
Kidd was handed his first loss at the end of this one when a beaten and battered Dreamer tagged in Bourne, who wasted no time in knocking Swagger from the apron and hitting the Shooting Star Press.
Tommy Dreamer & Evan Bourne win by Pinfall.
Final Segment
Money in the Bank V.I.P Lounge
All the entrants in the Money in the Bank match were present in M.V.P’s V.I.P Lounge, as well as Hornswaggle and Tony Atlas.
M.V.P introduced himself as the new U.S Champion while the camera cut to a shot of Shelton Benjamin (the former U.S Champion) looking less than impressed. He outlined the concept of the Money in the Bank match for anyone who hadn’t heard the description the last 20,000 times it had been explained.
M.V.P then thanked Christian for letting him bring his V.I.P Lounge to ECW rather than taking it old school and having an edition of ‘The Peep Show’. Christian said he was welcome, and the main reason he had done it was because he and everyone else knows that the segment is likely to break down into a brawl, and he didn’t want his furniture getting ruined. He then claimed he was going to win the match before Shelton Benjamin jumped in to make the very same claim.
Shelton then had a couple of digs at M.V.P, both of which he shot down by simply reminding him that he beat him for the U.S Title on Smackdown. It was then Punk’s turn to claim he had the match sewn up, stating his victory last year as the reason.
Kingston interupted him and said his leaping ability was sure to win the match, Henry said his strength would win it for him and finally Finlay said his Shaleighle would secure him the victory.
M.V.P wrapped up by saying they had heard from everyone but Kane, and asked the Big Red Machine what his views were. After a sadistic laugh Kane raised his arms and then brought them down to ignite his pyros, rounding off the segment and the show as the rest of the MitB entrants left the ring.
The Smackdown Summary - 27/03/2009
Opening Match
C.M Punk, Kofi Kingston, M.V.P & Mark Henry (w/Tony Atlas) Vs. Finlay, Kane, Christian & Shelton Benjamin
Straight into the action tonight on Smackdown with another 4 on 4 Money in the Bank themed match.$
This time Christian and Mark Henry switched teams, I assume in an attempt to make it look less like they were classing Finlay as a heel.
As with the match on Raw, a lot went on in this one, but really it only served as more fuel for the match at WrestleMania. Kane and Finlay had an altercation early on despite being on the same team, further promoting the message that there are no allies in the Money in the Bank match.
A lack of solidarity between the teams looked like it might become a running theme in this bout, as Shelton chose to tag Kane in rather than face Mark Henry, then tagged himself back into the match when M.V.P was in a vulnerable position.
Kane picked up an assured victory when he caught C.M Punk and hit him with a Chokeslam as the straight-edge superstar attempted to fly from the top rope. Things broke down into a brawl and as everyone else had occupied themselves outside of the ring Christian set up a ladder and looked sure to make a statement by grabbing the briefcase just over a week early.
Hornswaggle made sure this didn’t happen, and with the help of Finlay he tipped the ladder sending Christian over the top rope and onto the other 6 participants. It was also announced that next week on Smackdown M.V.P will defend his United States Championship against Shelton Benjamin.
Finlay, Kane, Christian & Shelton Benjamin win by Pinfall.
Match 2
Jesse & Festus Vs. The Big Show in a 2 on 1 Handicap Match
I didn’t expect this one would last long and it didn’t. Despite Festus being almost as tall as The Big Show, he made him look tiny in comparison. Jesse and Festus hit a shoulder block and a big kick to the head (which was 2 more moves than I assumed they would) but this just angered the giant, who promptly dispatched them both with Knockout Punches, standing on Jesse’s chest afterwards to pick up the pinfall.
More shameless hype for WrestleMania, executed in a very ‘days gone by’ manner with the ‘Superstar’ destroying jobbers before facing another ‘Superstar’ at the PPV.
More great news followed this one, when we were informed that later in the show Jeff Hardy will tell us about his match with Matt at WrestleMania. No doubt we’re in for more screamy, shouty, over-emphasised ramblings. I’d personally much rather see another Extreme Rules squash match.
The Big Show wins by Pinfall.
Segment 1
Matt and New Jack
After a pretty well cut together promo video for the Hardy’s rivalry, with personal footage of Jeff and his dog, Matt delivered a promo with a new Jack Russell on his knee.
He said that ‘the black cloud’ over Jeff’s head had been there his whole life, not just since his house had burned down, but that was when people began to notice it. He then said that he had been waiting for WrestleMania XXV his whole life, and when he gets there he plans on taking Jeff to the extreme and extinguishing the fire that burns inside him, leaving his brother with the realisation that he is “nothing more than a under-achieving, heartless, selfish child”.
(Apologies to any die hard ECW fans who thought Jerome Young might have joined the WWE based on the segment title)
Match 3
Rey Mysterio Vs. Chavo Guererro
Although I don’t usually say many positive things about Rey Mysterio, I do think that Chavo brings out th ebest in him and vice-versa, so when I saw that these two were going to face each other in a singles match I instantly expected something good.
The last time these two feuded a lot of the matches had gimmicky stipulations and I personally don’t believe they need them. Some matches (like Rey and JBL for example) could do with a gimmick to spice them up and make them different to the last 3 or 4 times the two guys met, but with Rey and Chavo they seem to be able to switch it about every time, keeping the matches between them fresh and interesting.
This match wasn’t the best I’ve seen them have, but it was certainly enjoyable and towards the end it really felt like it could go either way, especially when Chavo hit the 3 Amigos and the Gory Bomb. It was Rey who grabbed the win in the end though, with his usual 619/Splash combo.
Immediately after the match JBL appeared in the ring and hit Rey with a Big Boot, in an attack J.R described as ‘dastardly’.
Rey Mysterio wins by Pinfall.
Segment 2
Cena talks about WrestleMania
After we are treated to another viewing of Cena’s ‘Ode to Vikki’ (see segment 2 from Raw) the former champ and fledgling movie star made his way to the ring to deliver yet another WrestleMania themed promo.
He started off by talking about the importance of Mania, it’s history and how it has evolved from a one night event to a week long fan-based phenomenon. But more than that, for the Superstars it is the grandest stage of them all, a place to settle business matters, and more often than not matters that are much more personal.
He said for the past few weeks he has felt like he has been part of some sort of bizarre Jerry Springer style love triangle, and before that had been pushed out of the title picture all together. This situation had driven him to blackmailing Vikki Guererro, something which he would do all over again if it was the difference between going to WrestleMania or not.
He underlined all of this with a vow that he would win the World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania and looked like he was about to leave the ring before The Big Show once again showed his face. He challenged Cena to a match on Raw which Cena accepted. A small standoff took place before Cena grabbed Show’s foot as he climbed over the top rope to leave the ring. After toying with him, he dumped the giant out of the ring in an embarrassing fashion; something that could come back to bite him next Monday on Raw.
Match 4
R-Truth Vs. Matt Hardy
R-Truth, or ‘Lumberjack #2′ as he will be known come WrestleMania, is apparently a long-time friend of the Hardys and has developed a problem with Matt based on his actions of late. At least that’s what Tazz told us as this one got underway.
This sounds an awful lot like when Gregory Helms called out Matt over a month ago about his treatment of ‘life long friend’ Jeff. Perhaps a ‘friends of Jeff Hardy’ tag team is in the pipeline… or maybe not.
In a match where the entrances seemed to take longer than the actual bout, Matt Hardy picked up the victory with a Twist of Fate after avoiding R-Truth’s attempt at a Booker T Axe Kick. Although more official than the beating Helms received, so far it seems that it’s Matt Hardy - 2, friends of Jeff Hardy - 0.
Matt Hardy wins by Pinfall.
Match 5
Primo, Carlito & Brie Vs. The Miz, John Morrison & Nikki
It’s a really good job the WWE aren’t relying on this rivalry to draw in the buyers for WrestleMania, because they’ve met so many times in the run up to the event that I’m not really sure what more they can do to surprise us, even with the scores of ‘we’ve got nothing better to do’ wrestlers surrounding the ring.
It seems like the creative team were also thinking along the same lines, as this match can’t have lasted more than a couple of minutes before Carlito hit the Back Stabber and picked up his second victory this week over his WrestleMania rivals.
Primo, Carlito & Brie win by Pinfall.
Segment 3
Jeff Hardy *Sigh*
I feel for Jeff I really do. It may come across like I dislike him, but I don’t… honestly. I like to watch him in the ring, I respect that he’s probably taken years off his life just for my (and every other WWE fans) entertainment, but the fact of the matter is he isn’t any good at delivering promos.
This shouldn’t be a problem, there have been plenty of really successful wrestlers who haven’t been able to cut a promo, in a lot of cases because they didn’t have a great grasp of the English language (Yokozuna, Andre the Giant, Kane when he was masked to name just a few), but they all did well because they had good managers.
Today’s WWE seems to be lacking good managers, and Jeff would be a great candidate to have one, so you see I don’t really blame him for his poor promos, I blame the people writing them or the people forcing him to deliver them.
As for this one, it was incredibly forced and at times seemed as if he was reading it from a script. He said something about how Matt was sick, Jeff would heal him and that they were no longer brothers, that’s pretty much all I got out of it, and I watched it 3 times.
Main Event Match
Maryse Vs. Michelle McCool for the WWE Divas Championship
The Diva’s division across all 3 brands seems to be at an all time low at the minute, despite having the largest selection of talented female wrestlers I can remember for a long while. Even in the late 90’s when the now deceased Fabulous Moolah took on Ivory for the WWE Womens Championship there seemed to be more going on in terms of rivalries and storylines, so the conclusion of this match was really pleasing to see.
Just when Michelle McCool seemed to have the upper hand over Michelle former Raw Diva Gail Kim, who until recently had been wrestling for rival promotion TNA, appeared as if from nowhere and delivered a Missile Dropkick from the top rope before grabbing the Divas Championship belt and making her intentions clear.
Match ended in a No-Contest.
Segment 4
HBK addresses The Undertaker
Much like when he delivered the line ‘Undefeated Streak. Rest. In. Peace’ on Raw, Michaels decided to parody The Undertaker once again. As a similar style of music to Takers played, HBK made his way to the ring in a long white trenchcoat, white fighting gloves, white vest, white trousers and white hat, flanked by druids in white robes and engulfed in clouds of white smoke.
Once there he quoted verses of the bible, then explained that while he and The Undertaker have co-existed in the company for 20 years and both been praised and critiqued in equal measures, this was where their similarity ended. The Undertaker stands for all that is evil, dwelling in the shadows while HBK would rather dwell in the spotlights.
He delivered more assurances that he would win at Mania, claiming he would drag Taker to the depths of hell before emerging victoriously. After more of the sombre Taker-esque music played, HBK’s usual theme kicked in and he began to remove the fighting gloves and trenchcoat while dancing around the ring.
Just as it looked like the show was set to end The Undertaker burst through the canvas of the ring and grabbed HBK by the ankles, knocking him to the floor. The two struggled and Taker attempted to deliver a Chokeslam but HBK squirmed out of it and escaped up the ramp to safety as the show did finally come to an end.
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