The ECW Digest - 15th December 2009
15/12/2009
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On with the show!
Quick Links
Opening Segment: ECW Homecoming
Match 1: The Hurricane Vs. Paul Burchill
Segment 3: The Abraham Washington Show with Maria
Match 2: Vladimir Kozlov Vs. Ezekiel Jackson
Segment 4: No, Call ME Nostradamus
Match 3: Barretta & Croft Vs. Cruz & Arias
Main Event: Kane Vs. Zack Ryder
The ECW Digest
Opening Segment
ECW Homecoming
After a promo explaining that Kane has been invited to tonight’s show, and an ad for The Abraham Washington Show with guest Maria, ECW General Manager Tiffany is introduced in the ring.
She sings the praises of TLC then says she was especially proud of the ECW title match, bringing out both participants to acknowledge their contribution.
Once both men have gingerly made their way to the ring they shake hands.
Tiffany says they really did steal the show and thanks them, prompting the ECW crowd in attendance to do so as well.
Shelton says that it’s the fans that inspired them to take the risks and make ECW what it is today, and although he didn’t know whether to shake Christian’s hand or punch him tonight, he’d like to thank him for Sunday night as it was the proudest moment of his career so far.
He admits that he fell a little short then challenges the ECW Champion to a re-match.
Tiffany begins to explain how The Gold Standard will be able to earn that opportunity, but William Regal cuts it short by heading to the ring with his Round Table.
Regal insults Tiffany’s voice, saying she sounds like a ‘Goose blowing a Kazoo’, then focuses on Shelton, telling him he should think about someone other than himself for once, namely Kane.
Tiffany tells him she was just about to explain Kane’s presence, but Regal cuts her off once more and asks if she has ‘gone mental’ by letting him back onto the show.
She says that it is a new concept and over the next few weeks she will be inviting a selection of former ECW members to the shows over the next few weeks in a ‘ECW Homecoming’ tournament.
Basically old ECW guys will face new ECW guys, and the eventual winner will face Christian at the Royal Rumble.
That’s the concept anyway, although Tiffany then says that Jackson and Kozlov will face each other too as part of the tournament, so I don’t know.
Match 1
Singles Match
The Hurricane
Vs.
The Ripper (w/ The Beautiful Nightmare)
I’d kind of been looking forward to this match until I realised that this is actually just a fairly innovative way of sneaking another Hurricane/Burchill match under our noses.
What next? The Hart Dynasty Vs. The Hip Hop Heroes (aka Cryme Tyme in Balaclavas)?
Luckily Hurricane/Burchill matches are slightly more interesting (for now at least) and this was no different.
The Ripper probably had the better of a match that could easily have swung both ways but after an unceremonious unmasking by The Hurricane he ultimately lost… again.
I expected them to run with this one for a bit longer.
What does the future hold for The Burchills now?
The Hurricane wins by Pinfall.
Segment 2
Bye Bye Burchills
Backstage the Burchills are wandering aimlessly and looking completely dejected when they bump into roving reporter Gregory Helms, who asked them how it went.
Burchill, seething with rage, explodes into a primal scream and walks away, prompting Gregory to ask ‘What’s up with that?’.
As he exits The Hurricane’s cape is clearly visible.
Segment 3
The Abraham Washington Show with Maria
You might think Abraham Washington would feel a little dejected tonight, after missing out on the Breakout Superstar of the Year Award at last night’s Slammys.
But he isn’t, as he probably realises he was lucky just to get a nomination, given that he isn’t really a Superstar yet, but more a glorified backstage interviewer.
After complaining about not winning at the Slammys and some banter with Big Tony, Abe brings out the 2009 Diva of the Year; Maria.
Abe asks her if she was embarrassed by Batista’s Kanye-West style interruption, playing the clip before she answers.
Maria says that as embarrassing as it was, at least she won a Slammy, prompting more complaints from the host.
Maria says he wasn’t robbed, she’s seen his show. Atlas says it stinks and gets chewed out by Abe as he chuckles to himself.
She lets Atlas play with her Slammy but refuses to let Abe, saying he can hold it next year when he wins one, which Atlas doubts will happen.
Abe says he voted for Michelle McCool and was glad Batista interrupted her last night, drawing boos from the crowd as the segment comes to an end.
Match 2
ECW Homecoming Qualifying Match
Vladimir Kozlov (w/William Regal)
Vs.
Ezekiel Jackson
Interestingly Regal made his way to the ring with Kozlov at the start of this match, but as it turns out this is where the allegiance began and ended.
This one didn’t run very long (sadly) and saw Regal trip Kozlov, costing him the match.
After the bell Kozlov caught Regal and looked to be hell bent on taking him out, until Jackson made the save and slammed the Moscow Mauler into the announce table.
Regal shouted abuse at him, calling him a traitor.
Dit Kozlov just turn face? If so, that could be the worst decision I’ve ever seen.
I don’t care about him much as a heel, but I certainly couldn’t care less about him as a face.
Ezekiel Jackson wins by Pinfall and qualifies for The ECW Homecoming Tournament.
Segment 4
No, Call ME Nostradamus
This week the WWEBlog Informant proclaimed himself a new-age Nostradamus after successfully predicting that both Sheamus and Drew McIntyre were destined for WWE Gold.
Well, WWEBloggers, I can go one better!
Remember how I said last week : “It seems they are pushing Croft and Barretta as a pair of hardcore gamers, using ‘Guitar Hero’ and ‘Mario Kart’ to warm up for matches. I’m surprised they haven’t used them to plug Smackdown Vs. Raw 2010 yet.”
Well, that’s exactly what this segment was. Croft and Barretta virtually defeated DX, then said they should have no problem replicating that tonight against considerably weaker opponents.
Match 3
Tag Team Match
Trent Barretta & Caylen Croft
Vs.
Julio Cruz & Jorge Arias
Croft and Barretta have new theme music tonight, which is much more fitting with their characters. A rarely seen positive move from the creative team.
Nothing on the ‘local talent’ again this week I’m afraid, apart from the fact that one of them (Cruz) shares a name with a famous footballer (soccer player for all our American friends) and the other shares his name with a famous poker player.
Sadly I expect the footballer and the poker player would have had an equally disappointing showing, as Cruz and Arias never got chance to show off their skills and lost to a new double team move from Croft and Barretta.
After the bell they snatched the microphone from the ring announcer, announced themselves as the winners and said they would be taking the Tag Team Slammy next year.
Croft & Barretta win by Pinfall.
Segment 5
Goldie and Tatsu
They really aren’t leaving much time for Kane’s ceremonious homecoming against Zack Ryder tonight, in fact by the time they sort out the entrances there’ll barely be enough for a squash match.
Goldust is still complaining about how the Divas took his joke badly last night.
He congratulates Tatsu on his big victory on Raw, then Kane makes an appearance.
Tatsu says something which Kane asks Goldust to translate, but instead he just ticks, leading Kane to ponder over who the biggest freak is.
Main Event Match
ECW Homecoming Qualification Match
Kane
Vs.
Zack Ryder (w/Rosa Mendes)
This was actually a good match, if not incredibly short and ultimately predictable.
Ryder mounted some decent offence, but nothing that ever looked in danger of stealing a win.
Kane picked up that accolade and qualified on in the Homecoming Tournament, scoring the 3 with a Chokeslam.
Kane wins by Pinfall and Qualifies for the ECW Homecoming Tournament.
