Hell in a Cell 2009 Previews and Predictions
Previews and Predictions of all the matches scheduled to take place at Hell in a Cell 2009.
After enjoying doing the previews and predictions article last week, JayD has once again left me, GRuz in charge!
For all the JayD fans out there, as always he’s put the work in for the formal articles, which you can find at the links below.
Here’s the link for JayD’s Smackdown preview:
WWE Hell in a Cell 2009 Smackdown Matches Preview
Which covers:
-The World Heavyweight Championship Hell in a Cell match between The Undertaker and C.M Punk
-The Intercontinental Championship match between John Morrison and Dolph Ziggler
-Unified Tag Team Championship match between Jeri-Show and Batista & Rey Mysterio
and here is the link to his Raw/ECW preview:
WWE Hell in a Cell 2009 Raw/ECW Matches Preview
Which covers:
-The WWE Championship Hell in a Cell match between Randy Orton and John Cena
-The United States Championship Triple Threat Match between Kofi Kingson, Jack Swagger and The Miz
-The Tag Team Hell in a Cell match between DX and Legacy
-The Divas Championship Match between Mickey James and Alicia Fox
GRuz’s Views
Intercontinental Championship Match
Singles Match
Dolph Ziggler
Vs.
John Morrison (c)
This is one of the harder matches to predict and, even though there’s a decent chance this will be the PPV’s lead-in match (and that’s a shame), it is one of the matches I am personally looking forward to the most.
Not to sound like a broken record, but I feel obliged to once again mention that this match should never really have happened, but thanks to Rey-Rey Mysterio’s brief suspension, the Intercontinental Championship has been thrown into a bit of disarray the past month and as a result Morrison picked up the title from Mysterio on Smackdown and adopted the feud with Dolph Ziggler.
So, knowing that WWE writers aren’t exactly known for pulling terrific storylines out of nowhere with little time to do so, how does one predict this match intelligently?
I love John Morrison. I think he’s awesome, but I also think that a man whose entrance includes wearing a fur coat and having wind blown through his hair doesn’t mesh too well with him being a face.
Morrison is best as a heel and, as much as I love this face turn, I’d imagine it’s not going to last too long.
Ziggler, on the other hand, is a heel through and through, as well as being over-hyped and underwhelming, in my opinion.
This may be a bit of a shock to my old pal JayD, but Ziggler irks me and isn’t half as interesting as Morrison right now.
Predicted Outcome:
Unfortunately, I really think that the writers meant to have Mysterio and Ziggler end up in a match and they’re going to make that happen sooner rather than later.
Morrison is a face now, Mysterio will ALWAYS be a face, and it’s pretty rare for the WWE to put mid-to-high-level faces against each other.
So the first step is for Ziggler to beat Morrison here.
Morrison has been on a roll and rolls tend to come to an end at PPV’s, so look for Morrison to control much of the match but Ziggler to pull a win out somehow, probably with one of those ridiculous ZigZags while Morrison is trying to put him away.
United States Championship Match
Triple Threat Match
The Miz
Vs.
Kofi Kingston (c)
Vs.
Jack Swagger
The U.S. Championship match lead-up was a semi-interesting storyline whereby the champ and his two challengers spent the last few weeks stealing the belt from each other, each one claiming to be the “real” champion.
It sorta reminded me of the old Hardcore division from back in the day, a division that I wish was still around, as it was quite popular and a lot of fun for fans to follow.
But I digress. This isn’t the proper venue for whining and nostalgia. It’s the venue for determining the winner of this here match.
Don’t ask me why, but I keep getting the feeling that the WWE has lassoed Jack Swagger in a three-way match because they’re not sure that he’s “ready for the big time”, as they say.
Kofi has been at or near the top of the U.S. Championship bracket for many months. And The Miz, no matter what you think of him, is now accepted by the fans as a real contender.
But I’m not sure about Swagger, and just to be clear, if there was somebody that I might be rooting for, it’s Swagger.
I think he’s got pretty good camera skills and could be the biggest a-hole this side of C.M. Punk if he ever gets that push.
Predicted Outcome:
Good ol’ J.R. and the rest of the commentary crew always love to point out that a 3-way match gives the champion a disadvantage.
Undoubtedly, they’ll be harping on that non-stop throughout the match. Normally, I’d figure that, once again, Kofi would win and retain, seeing as how the commentators will take that old angle of Kofi not having a chance.
But I don’t know.
This bracket is feeling a bit stagnant with Kofi constantly winning and winning and winning some more.
I’m not getting the feeling that it will continue.
Kofi’s gotta be the heavy favorite, but call me crazy -I see The Miz pulling this off in an upset.
Unified Tag Team Championship Match
Tag Team Match
Chris Jericho & The Big Show (c)
Vs.
Batista & Rey Mysterio
Welcome to the 2009 Hell in a Cell bathroom break!!!
“What???” you say. “A match with Chris Jericho, The Big Show, Batista, and Mysterio is a bathroom break match??? Slander and poppycock!!!”
Sadly, it is so.
Here is where the WWE writers could really surprise me by fooling me big-time. But they won’t - I’ve got this match so figured out, it’s not funny.
This is such a classic angle, I could predict this one in my sleep. You’ve got one monster team who’s had the belts for months, beating every team put in front of them. They’re not only ripe for a fall, they’re now against a team made up of Batista (!!!) and Rey Mysterio (!!!), two of the biggest crowd favorites in all of wrestling.
To top it off, Batista is just back from an injury and Mysterio is just back from his aforementioned “wellness” violation. Oh man, this is hilarious and ridiculous at the same time.
Predicted Outcome:
There’s a chance that the seemingly-inevitable outcome is SO obvious that it’s a big trick on the part of the writers to keep Jeri-Show going and make me look like a fool here, but that chance is about 1%.
How many crowd favorites have you ever heard of that come back after months of injury rehabilitation and get written in to LOSE a title match when they come back? That’s just not happening.
Jericho and Show have been titleholders for what feels like forever and they’re not going to roll over a dream team like Batista/Mysterio.
Batista will BatistaBomb Jericho at one point or possibly use his newly-learned Ankle Lock. Either way, pardon the pun, the show’s over.
Divas Championship Match
Divas Match
Mickie James (c)
Vs.
Alicia Fox
I’m really not trying to sound sexist here, but why can’t the Women’s division get a good storyline going?
It’s not the wrestlers, I would surmise, as most of the women wrestlers are athletes on par with any of the men. So apparently, it’s the WWE writers (big surprise) that can’t come up with any rivalry without making all the divas look like catty, shallow, jealous idiots.
Anyway…
Mickey James is a solid champion and is up against a, no offense, lower-level player in the Diva division right now.
Alicia Fox has gained a bit of momentum and press with her recent heel turn, but is just not on James’ level. The playing field will be leveled in this one, however. Let’s not forget Rosa Mendes, Fox’s little hanger-on of late, who will undoubtedly be on hand to throw in a cheap shot or three.
Then there’s the Glamazon, who hates anybody who’s ever touched the title belt, and will most likely make her presence known at some point. Pardon yet another pun but there’s good chance that all “Hell” will literally break loose in this one.
Predicted Outcome:
As much as the odds are stacked against James in this one, I just don’t foresee Alicia Fox being crowned Champion in a division where there are so many more talented veterans.
I think James is going to hang in there to face a more serious threat, i.e. the Glamazon, at a PPV in the near future.
Grudge Match
Tag Team Hell in a Cell Match
D Generation X
Vs.
Legacy
So who remembers that match at WrestleMania several years ago when Evolution minus Triple H fought the Rock and Sock Connection?
Remember that one?
Remember how everyone assumed that RSC would destroy Evolution, but Evolution won after Randy Orton RKO’ed Mick Foley?
I don’t mean to brag here, but I didn’t.
I expected Evolution to win.
Just like I expected Legacy to beat DX at Breaking Point. Here’s why:
Older, veteran wrestlers who are pretty decent guys behind the scenes get to the point where they know that they’ve only got a few good years left in them.
Often, this coincides with a particular guy or guys who are younger and inexperienced, but full of potential and in the early stages of getting a push by WWE management.
This is why Evolution beat the Rock and Sock Connection at WrestleMania several years ago and why Legacy beat DX at Breaking Point.
HHH might be good for a few more years but Mr. Perpetual Retiree Shawn Michaels has got to be through pretty soon, one would think. So the reformation of DX wasn’t so much for nostalgia’s sake, but to show how great Legacy is and could be in the future.
The whole point of this rivalry is for DX to put Legacy over and give them street cred. Just like The Rock and Mick Foley lost to Randy Orton - it let the wrestling world know that Orton was going to be a major player very soon.
So what we’re really looking at is the eventual and final end of DX. But I don’t mean to say that Legacy will just beat the snot out of DX over and over until they finally go away.
There has to be a little give-and-take. If Legacy and DX are put into a rivalry and Legacy wins every time, that cheapens the storyline. Fans will catch on to what’s happening and enthusiasm for the rivalry will die.
Predicted Outcome:
DX is in a preferred environment at Hell in a Cell. Both men have had ample experience with the Cell and are coming off an embarrassing loss.
I think DX takes this one to further fuel the rivalry and have fans waiting for the next meeting between these two teams.
Find out more about DX’s experience inside the Cell by reading our ‘History of Hell in a Cell‘ article!
WWE Championship Match
Hell in a Cell Match
Randy Orton
Vs.
John Cena (c)
It’s a strange thing in wrestling where, to keep things feeling fresh and new, old storylines are almost totally ignored to make new storylines seem like they’re happening for the first time.
Perhaps there is no better example of that than matches between Randy Orton and John Cena.
Orton and Cena will be fighting for the WWE Championship at Hell in a Cell, only about the 427th meeting between the two. And yet, the fans are expected to treat this as a monumental, earth-shattering event on par with Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant at Wrestlemania 3.
I have no problem in admitting that both men are great wrestlers and great promo-givers (in their own way), but we’ve seen this so many times, it’s a prime example of the current dilution of talent in the top levels of the WWE.
We’ve seen the same 8-10 guys fight for both titles for more times than I can count and this is just another recycling of an old rivalry. There are ways that the WWE could really spice things up, but they have yet to muster the guts to do it.
*cough*turn Cena heel*cough*…
Anyhow, let’s get to the action. Randy Orton had been WWE Champion for a considerable length of time until being toppled by Cena at Breaking Point.
So now we are in for a Hell in a Cell match to “settle it once and for all” (snort).
Much has been made of Cena having never participated in a Hell in a Cell match and Orton having lots of experience both in the cell and at fighting dirty.
Apparently, the big question is if Cena can fight on Orton’s level, i.e. dirty, to come out with a victory.
Predicted Outcome:
As a longtime Cena-hater, I regret to say that I see him retaining here.
He hasn’t been champion for very long and high-level champions generally retain for a considerable amount of time, as a quirk of WWE storylines often seem to include the caveat of just having the belt in your possession makes you superhuman and near-invincible.
As ridiculous as it sounds, it will probably be mentioned that these two need more “time” to “develop” a “rivalry”, regardless of the fact that it feels like these two have had a match every week since about 2002.
Cena is being put in a position as an underdog here, as the current storyline has people questioning his toughness against Orton. Naturally, he’ll pull off a win to silence the haters.
World Heavyweight Championship Match
Hell in a Cell Match
C.M Punk (c)
Vs.
The Undertaker
This match is one of the more difficult ones to predict, regardless of the direction that the storyline appears to be going. C.M. Punk is a great champion and a fantastic heel, one of the most-hated heels in recent history, in fact.
I correctly picked Punk to beat the Undertaker at Breaking Point, but was disappointed that his victory ended up coming via a shady referee and phantom-tap storyline. I think that kind of storyline does a disservice to Punk and doesn’t do any favors for the Taker, either.
So now the odds are set even more heavily against Punk. The Taker’s Hell’s Gate hold has now been ruled as a legal move and not a choke after he decided to beat a ruling out of Teddy Long that favored him.
The Undertaker has actually spent the past few weeks working behind the scenes, manipulating rule changes and other favorable decisions through scare tactics or outright beatings. Punk hasn’t seemed too concerned with the Undertaker directly, but has been increasingly taken out of his game when confronted with evidence that the deck has been stacked more and more in favour of The Deadman.
So by the time they face each other in the ring, I doubt there will be 10 people in the whole arena that expect C.M. Punk to retain his World Championship title. And, as usual, this just feels a bit weird.
It’s already common knowledge among hardcore fans that the Undertaker is a hell of a guy and very generous to his opponents (see his elimination by Maven, of all people, in a Royal Rumble several years ago).
So to set up a story that involves the Taker being not much more than a bully, manipulating everyone to set up a match that he prefers, with rules that blatantly favor him, just so he can easily destroy his hapless opponent and become champ seems really disingenuous to me.
Predicted Outcome:
This is the match where the writers throw a wrench in the works and pencil in an outcome that goes against everyone’s expectations.
It’s a Hell in the Cell match - Undertaker’s playground. Taker can use his Hell’s Gate. Taker can do this. Taker can do that. It won’t matter.
I’m going out on a major limb here, but I think that, even with all of the obstacles set against him, C.M. Punk finds a way to win. Maybe some outside interference is possible, although I can’t think of many people who would want to help Punk considering his recent actions.
No matter. The man is a hilarious and successful heel and I’d love to see this extended a bit longer.
The End
Thanks again for joining me for the previews and predictions, feel free to use the contact form to let me know if you agree or disagree as we always love to hear from our readers at WWEBlog.co.uk.
I hope you consider joining JayD for the Live Results which will take place as soon as the show begins on Sunday…Obviously and I hope you’re looking forward to it as much as we are!
GRuz (on behalf of the WWEBlog.co.uk Team)
